The short story is that Mother took children on a 2012 vacation to see grandparents from our home in Maryland before the start of the Maryland school year. She never returned and there was joint legal custody awarded.
Since then, my son has been sexually abused by a Saginaw Minor. Mother confirmed (on court record) that the bully bit my son's private area and that she and the teacher "handled it". The matter is now simultaneously before Child Protective services and Saginaw has temporarily given full legal custody to mother.
There will be a permanent decision pending another interview by the Saginaw Friend of the Court.
Chief Saginaw County Circuit Judge Fred Borchard is rescheduling 2012 inter-state custody case from (Tuesday) January 28th at 8:30 am due to a murder trial The new trial will be ????:
Logistical Breakdown of the 2013 Christmas Break
Per a 10/2013 parenting order, Melissa Calice was responsible for bringing her children (7 year old Rocco and 5 year old Mia) from Baltimore, MD to Saginaw, MI at the end of their Holiday break on 1/5/2014.
On 1/3/2014, Melissa informed Tony that she would not be travelling to Baltimore and instructed Tony to put the children unaccompanied on a flight back to Saginaw, MI on 1/5/2014.
Tony had attempted to engage Melissa in dialog about the Holiday travel logistics multiple times, beginning in 11/2013. Melissa was not responsive and provided no details about travel logistics until 1/3/2014.
The children had never previously flown unaccompanied.
Tony and Melissa had not previously discussed (let alone reached an agreement around) whether the children were ready to fly unaccompanied.
5 year old Mia was very frightened about the idea of flying without a parent. She openly expressed this to both Tony and Melissa.
On 1/5/2014, neither of the children had acquired the life skill of being able to call a parent in the case of an emergency.
On 1/5/2014, Saginaw, Michigan was experiencing one of the biggest snowstorms in 25 years. The aftermath of the storm shut down the majority of the town of Saginaw for 3 days. The airport, courthouse, schools, and retail outlets were all impacted. The storm was widely covered as a very dangerous weather event and the public was urged to keep travel to an absolute minimum.
Tony did not force his frightened 5 year old daughter, Mia, to fly unaccompanied to Saginaw, Michigan on 1/5/2014.
Even if conditions had been optimal on 1/5/2014, the travel arrangements made by Melissa failed to meet the minimum legal and safety requirements of the Transportation Security Administration (TSA) for unaccompanied minors.
TSA legal and safety guideline are clear
Southwest Airlines Authorities have been engaged and will inform Chief Saginaw County Circuit Judge Fred Borchard that they are bound by the governance of TSA.
Transportation Security Administration (TSA) Authorities have been engaged and will inform Judge Borchard that the child did not have an Acceptable ID (in lieu of the Birth Certificate stolen by the Plaintiff).
When Melissa moved the children to Michigan in 08/2012 without Tony's prior knowledge, she also took all of the children's legal documents (i.e. Birth Certificate, SS Cards, etc.) One of these documents would have been required for the children to fly unaccompanied.
Melissa did not provide any of these documents when Tony picked up the children in Michigan on 12/21/2013, nor was there any indication prior to 1/3/2014 that they would be needed.
Pursuant to 1/5/2014, Melissa refused to cooperate with Tony to get the children returned safely to Michigan.
Tony contacted the children's teachers to make sure they would not fall behind in school while the logistics were being finalized.
Rather than working towards an amicable resolution, Melissa told the children their Dad made a big mistake, she told Tony that she would support him going to jail to teach him a lesson and, finally, she pursued a court order to punish Tony.
Saginaw Friend of the Court, Sue Prine, worked with Mary Goedert (children's maternal grandmother), Melissa and Melissa's attorneys to prepare a court order which was signed on 1/8/2014 by Chief Saginaw County Circuit Judge Fred Borchard.
Per the court order, Tony was instructed to fly the children back to Michigan on 1/11/14.
Neither Tony nor his attorneys were given the ability to present their facts prior to the issuance of the court order.
The cost to Tony was over $838 (Airfare Cost, Parking, Meals)
While Tony disagreed with the court order, he complied with it
Tony is pursuing an opportunity for all facts in the case to be reviewed, as he is convinced they will support his actions on 1/5/2014. He is also pursuing reimbursement for the ticket fees that were imposed upon him and clarity around go-forward logistics.
This recent incident is just the latest in an ongoing pattern of Melissa's refusal to collaborate with Tony for the best interests of their children. It also indicates her belief that she is not bound to follow the court-issued parenting order for parents that live more than 100 miles away.
Tony has continually faced a "partner" that is unwilling to collaborate on co-parenting decisions.
This threatens to cause future instability for Rocco and Mia.
While not his first choice, Tony will proceed to a trial if needed to address the issue.
Chief Saginaw County Circuit Judge Fred Borchard has indicated that he will put either Tony or Melissa in jail if forced to hear the matter at a trial. Tony has no desire for either Melissa or himself to go to jail, however, he is committed to pursuing justice and closure on this matter and will continue to do so with full respect for the rule of the law.
Current Status: No Agreement. Melissa has not realized that she is responsible for the transportation. Melissa does not appear to have been informed of what her responsibilities are.
Saturday 1/11/2014: Melissa Round Trip Ticket for herself from Flint
Leg 1: 9:25 AM 1/11/2014 SWA FLT 2247 Departs FLINT (FNT) and arrives at Baltimore/Washington, MD (BWI) at 11:00 am
Leg 2: 3:25 PM 1/11/2014 SWA FLT 3025 Departs Baltimore/Washington, MD (BWI) at 3:25 am and arrives at FLINT (FNT) at 5:10pm
Saturday 1/11/2014: Melissa purchases two tickets for children from BWI to Flint (Tony Pay's for Rocco's Travel)
*Purchase Rocco's Ticket with Tony's SWA Travel Funds: Rocco's SWA Travel Funds can be accessed with the confirmation #:GQMTGH
Leg 2: 3:25 PM 1/11/2014 SWA FLT 3025 Departs Baltimore/Washington, MD (BWI) at 3:25 am and arrives at FLINT (FNT) at 5:10pm
Saturday 1/11/2014: Melissa greets Tony and children at BWI SWA passenger drop off (Terminal A) at 1:25pm
Message to Tom:
Melissa's travel arrangements did not meet parenting time requirements for numerous reasons:
Rocco and Mia did not have an accompanying parent at the BWI Airport. Therefore they not board
Unaccompanied flight was not an option for several reasons:
The Parenting Order states that children must be accompanied by an adult with whom they are familiar.
All previous exchanges have followed this protocol. There has been absolutely no precedent set which deviates from this order.
At no point as there been any discussion (let alone agreement) by Tony and Melissa that the children are currently capable of flying unaccompanied.
The flight time was scheduled at the beginning of a major winter storm which did, in fact, shut down Saginaw, MI for nearly 3 days. As Tony has traveled frequently for work, he has experienced many weather-related flight changes and diversions and would be very uncomfortable having his children face this prospect without a trusted adult,
Tony does not yet support allowing his children to fly unaccompanied, as he is not yet comfortable with the children flying unaccompanied. His reasons are as follows
Mia (5 year old daughter) is scared to fly without her parents and Tony is not comfortable forcing her to do so. Mia communicated her fear to her mother on facetime (several times) during the week.
Both Rocco (7 years old) and Mia, lack basic life skills that should be mastered before flying on their own. For instance, neither child knows how to dial a telephone to call their parents if anything were to happen. Also, neither child has access to a mobile phone which could be used in the course of travel.
Even if the Parenting Order had been modified to allow the children to be escorted by an airline employee with whom they are not familiar (which it wasn't), and even if both Tony and Melissa had agreed to let the children fly unaccompanied (which they hadn't), Melissa's travel arrangements would have lacked several necessary requirements:
At no point has Melissa provided any documentation showing Tony that Unaccompanied Minor passes were in fact purchased. She sent Tony a copy of reservation details which show only the purchase of base fares, taxes and airport fees.
Southwest Airlines' policy requires that unaccompanied minors have “Proof of the UM's age (birth certificate, etc.)”
Tony is not in possession of the children's Birth Certificates, as Melissa took these documents with her when she traveled to Michigan in 2012.
The children's MD Identification Cards were lost in Tony's car theft in 2013
Melissa did not provide the Birth Certificates (or other suitable ID) to Tony or the children when they met at FNT airport on December 20th, 2013
At no point did Melissa mention or imply that any such identification would be necessary.
Melissa provided no indication until January 2nd that she was not intending to meet the children at BWI airport (she had not provided any information about the children's travel arrangement until this date despite repeated attempts by Tony to discuss the logistics). Even if Tony had immediately realized that he needed documentation for the children and even if he had immediately pursued it, it would not have been possible since the flight was scheduled to occur in one business day from that point.
Tony is concerned about potential harm caused to the children by missing school. However, he has attempted to make the best of this situation:
He immediately sent non-judgmental, non-accusatory emails to the children's teachers making them aware of a "breakdown in logistics" and requesting any work that the teachers would like him to do with the children prior to their return.
He is doing everything possible to set them up for a successful semester:
He has followed the directions he received from Mia's teacher and sent her samples of what they had been working on (drawing a picture of her vacation, writing a story using finger spaces between words, capitalizing only the first letter in a sentence, etc.)
Rocco's teacher has not sent specific work requests, so Tony has been working with him extensively on spelling, which has been a challenging area for Rocco this year.
Tony has tried to work with Melissa to coordinate logistics to return the children to Michigan. He has offered to fly with the children back to Michigan if Melissa will pay for the ticket, saving her a full day of travel. Not only has Melissa has refused to engage in any productive dialog, her statements have indicated a willingness to demean the children's relationship with their father. Her statements have included:
"Like I told the children, you made a mistake and now you have to figure out how to fix it."
"As far as Amelia being frightened of the plane, it was your job as a parent to give her coping skills to deal with her fear as well as build up her strength. Instead you fostered her fear in order to use her as a tool in your agenda. You are a sick, sick man and the children will eventually figure it on their own, if they aren't already."
"My lawyer thinks you're a flaming idiot"
"During your October Contempt of Court hearing, Judge Borchard asked me directly if I wanted you to spend time in the Saginaw County Jail. As a social worker in this community, I've heard horror stories about the Saginaw County Jail and I vehemently said I did not, concerned for your well-being as you are unaccustomed to the violence you will find there. If asked again I will have a different answer indeed."
3. While Southwest’s website says that they will not allow UM on flights that may be diverted, #7 specifies that you should do the following “Check the flights that may be diverted or cancelled due to inclement weather or other operational abnormalities” http://www.southwest.com/html/customer-service/family/unaccompanied-minors-pol.html. This could be interpreted multiple ways but sure sounds like they expect the parent to use logic b. You would have needed to bring “Proof of the UM's age (birth certificate, etc.)”. I haven’t heard that she sent these with the children to Baltimore http://www.southwest.com/html/customer-service/family/unaccompanied-minors-pol.htm
How did the children get to Maryland?
5pm December, 21st: Tony greeted Melissa and children at the Flint Airport passenger drop-off zone.
December 2nd: Tony purchased tickets and provided itinerary to Melissa three weeks in advance.
Did Tony make a reasonable effort to discuss travel plans?
Yes
November 8th 2013: Tony initiates discussion on travel for children (never read by Melissa)
November 12th 2013: Tony initiates discussion on children’s health (never read by Melissa)
November 25th 2013: Tony continues to seek discussion on travel for children (never read by Melissa)
December 2nd 2013: Tony purchases tickets and offers to pay for Rocco’s Airfare (never read by Melissa)
December 31st 2013: Tony continues to seek discussion of travel for children (never read by Melissa)
January 1st 2014: Tony continues to seek discussion of travel for children and informs Melissa that Mia does not want to fly by herself
January 1st 2014: Mia pleads for he mom to accompany her on the flight to Michigan
January 2nd 2014: Melissa email tickets for Rocco and Mia
January ?? 2014: Tony Offers to accompany children if Melissa provides credit card for him to purchase his ticket.
January 5th 2014: Tony and Children at BWI airport for 9:55am flight to Flint. Melissa did not arrange for a parent to fly with the children. As such, children did not board plan and are still in Maryland
It would not have been a prudent decision for a parent to put their child on a plane in worst snow storm in 25 years (according to Weather Channel). A significant number of flights were diverted to other airports.
Children unable to dial/use a telephone
Daughter scared of flying by herself
Children would be entirely dependent on strangers in the event that the flight was unable to land at the intended airport (in event of an airport closure)
Also, the court is going to want to know for this same period of time how much income you had from both jobs and how much income Melissa had. (Oct '11-Aug '12)
and then make a determination as to whether there was money left over every month, (Oct '11-Aug '12)
8
or whether the two of you were using credit cards to finance your lifestyle due to the fact that enough income was not available to maintain you in the manner you chose to live (Oct '11-Aug '12)
More Items = 8,905.50* After 8/13 Melissa personal purchases from Tony’s account ($2,805.50)
8/27 Check for Saginaw Preschool Tuition ($1,120) Total Tuition was 4.5k
9/1 Tony deposits into Melissa’s account ($1,600)
38,525.32
6
Melissa's Student Loans (4 x 887.83 = $3,551.32**)
11/24: $583.07 (auto withdrawl from PNC)11/24: $304.76 (auto withdrawl from Credit Union)
42,076.64
7
Related to Stolen Car
Rental Approx = $700 *Rented a larger car to assist in bringing items such as Mia's Bedroom Furniture to Michigan
42,776.64
List of Tom Questions - Oct 20 Memo (May already be somewhere on this wiki page)
1. Are you in agreement to sell RO home? What realtor to use? Listing price? How to handle future lowering of asking price if necessary?
2. Is Melissa's name on the mortgage?
3.Specific examples of what Melissa did wrong to limit Facetime or prevent you from seeing the kids.
4. My Question - "Whether you should be reimbursed for moving expenses" I thought that was decided.
List of Tom Questions - October 24 meeting (very rough) Love and Affection ? Confirm dates Melissa was working on her Masters ? Jewelry – what Melissa bought for herself-appraisals or receipts ? Melissa’s student loan – Payment amounts and # of Months ? List and Pictures of recent U-haul delivery ? Cleaning Lady (you est. 300-400/mo) ? Examples of spending $$ unnecessarily – (list of shops?)
Stable Environment ? St. Paul enrollment fee – (didn’t Melissa retrieve these $$$?) ? Pictures of Borowiecki home ? JacksonSchool –gifted programs, stats, academics, brochures, etc. Bus – how long is the bus ride from home to school?
Questions/notes from Tom Meeting 10/31/2013**
1. Income from FEI and CCS two date ranges
Jan - Aug 2012 and Aug - Dec 2012
2. Tony's Proposed Budget. This be superimposed on IRS, Student Loans, Atty Fees ($500 mthly pmts each) and RAC Promissory Notes ($300 mthly pmt)
3. Melissa PNC - status as of today? Is Tony simply a primary user, primary or joint on the account.
4. # of times Rick and Anne dropped off clothes/things to Melissa
Notes: Life insurance-change beneficiary to children?
The short story is that Mother took children on a 2012 vacation to see grandparents from our home in Maryland before the start of the Maryland school year. She never returned and there was joint legal custody awarded.
Since then, my son has been sexually abused by a Saginaw Minor. Mother confirmed (on court record) that the bully bit my son's private area and that she and the teacher "handled it". The matter is now simultaneously before Child Protective services and Saginaw has temporarily given full legal custody to mother.
There will be a permanent decision pending another interview by the Saginaw Friend of the Court.
OCTOBER 1, 2014
OCTOBER 3, 2014
OCTOBER 7, 2014
Follow-up Fax after phone call
Chief Saginaw County Circuit Judge Fred Borchard is rescheduling 2012 inter-state custody case from (Tuesday) January 28th at 8:30 am due to a murder trial
The new trial will be ????:
Logistical Breakdown of the 2013 Christmas Break
Bob Lawblaw's Law Blog
Southwest does not accept Expired Identification as Valid Identification
EXPIRED IDENTIFICATION LOST IN 2012 CAR THEFT
Trial notice from the court for (Tuesday) January 28th at 8:30 a.m.
Children's School Schedule: School Schedule
Today's Discussion
Issue:
Current Status: No Agreement. Melissa has not realized that she is responsible for the transportation. Melissa does not appear to have been informed of what her responsibilities are.
Leg 1: 9:25 AM 1/11/2014 SWA FLT 2247 Departs FLINT (FNT) and arrives at Baltimore/Washington, MD (BWI) at 11:00 am
Leg 2: 3:25 PM 1/11/2014 SWA FLT 3025 Departs Baltimore/Washington, MD (BWI) at 3:25 am and arrives at FLINT (FNT) at 5:10pm
*Purchase Rocco's Ticket with Tony's SWA Travel Funds: Rocco's SWA Travel Funds can be accessed with the confirmation #:GQMTGH
Leg 2: 3:25 PM 1/11/2014 SWA FLT 3025 Departs Baltimore/Washington, MD (BWI) at 3:25 am and arrives at FLINT (FNT) at 5:10pm
Message to Tom:
- Reservation (No Unaccompanied Minor or companion adult)
Click to Enlarge Itinerary Sent By Melissa to Tony
- http://www.southwest.com/assets/pdfs/customer_service/um_form.pdf.
3. While Southwest’s website says that they will not allow UM on flights that may be diverted, #7 specifies that you should do the following “Check the flights that may be diverted or cancelled due to inclement weather or other operational abnormalities” http://www.southwest.com/html/customer-service/family/unaccompanied-minors-pol.html. This could be interpreted multiple ways but sure sounds like they expect the parent to use logicb. You would have needed to bring “Proof of the UM's age (birth certificate, etc.)”. I haven’t heard that she sent these with the children to Baltimore http://www.southwest.com/html/customer-service/family/unaccompanied-minors-pol.htm
How/Where was this discussed:
It would not have been a prudent decision for a parent to put their child on a plane in worst snow storm in 25 years (according to Weather Channel). A significant number of flights were diverted to other airports.
Issue: Melissa interfering with facetime:
(suggest showing your budgeting efforts before Melissa started with her budget.)
- 2009: $160/Mo
- 2012: $320/Mo
Cable TVFamily Expenses in Maryland
Anne's Google Spreadsheet
Melissa's Budget 2010 to 2012
Tony's Income:
Melissa's Income
BofA (2.5k) - $28/mo
PNC (7k) - $200/mo
ING (1k) - $30/mo
MichCath (5.3 k) - $90/molnth
Questions to Tom
2012 (July to December) Cost to Maintain Status Quo
10,812.82
Parenting Time Costs _v2
Paid 2011 Property Taxes & Insurance -Est
Total Tuition was 4.5k
11/24: $583.07 (auto withdrawl from PNC)11/24: $304.76 (auto withdrawl from Credit Union)
*Rented a larger car to assist in bringing items such as Mia's Bedroom Furniture to Michigan
1. Are you in agreement to sell RO home? What realtor to use? Listing price? How to handle future lowering of asking price if necessary?
2. Is Melissa's name on the mortgage?
3.Specific examples of what Melissa did wrong to limit Facetime or prevent you from seeing the kids.
4. My Question - "Whether you should be reimbursed for moving expenses" I thought that was decided.
List of Tom Questions - October 24 meeting (very rough)
Love and Affection
? Confirm dates Melissa was working on her Masters
? Jewelry – what Melissa bought for herself-appraisals or receipts
? Melissa’s student loan – Payment amounts and # of Months
? List and Pictures of recent U-haul delivery
? Cleaning Lady (you est. 300-400/mo)
? Examples of spending $$ unnecessarily – (list of shops?)
Stable Environment
? St. Paul enrollment fee – (didn’t Melissa retrieve these $$$?)
? Pictures of Borowiecki home
? JacksonSchool –gifted programs, stats, academics, brochures, etc.
Bus – how long is the bus ride from home to school?
1. Income from FEI and CCS two date ranges
Jan - Aug 2012 and Aug - Dec 2012
2. Tony's Proposed Budget. This be superimposed on IRS, Student Loans, Atty Fees ($500 mthly pmts each) and RAC Promissory Notes ($300 mthly pmt)
3. Melissa PNC - status as of today? Is Tony simply a primary user, primary or joint on the account.
4. # of times Rick and Anne dropped off clothes/things to Melissa
Notes: Life insurance-change beneficiary to children?
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